Femme Allyship

A Femme Ally strives to...

Be a friend
Be a listener
Be open-minded
Have their own opinions
Be willing to talk
Commit themselves to personal growth
Recognize their personal boundaries
Confront their own biases
Join others with a common purpose
Treat all persons regardless of identity with dignity and respect
Engage in the process of developing a community free of femme-phobia

The following thoughts about being an ally are adapted from "Teaching for Diversity and Social Justice," edited by Maurianne Adams, Lee Anne Bell and Pat Griffin (Routledge Press, 1997).

What are Femme Allies?

Femme allies want to support and enhance the power and visibility of femme identities, and recognize that to do so will also enhance and support their own identities.

Femme allies take responsibility for learning how various oppressions work in the lives of the femmes.

Femme allies listen to the experiences of femmes with respect and non-judgment .

Femme allies recognize that unlearning oppressive beliefs about femmes is a process, and they welcome opportunities to learn.

Femme allies are willing to take risks and try new behaviors.

Femme allies are willing to make mistakes and learn from them; when they are unsure of something, they are willing to ask questions and respect the answers of those whose power and visibility they support.

Femme allies are willing to be challenged and confronted about their own behavior and attitudes.

Femme Allies understand the connections among all forms of social oppression and injustice, and believe they can make a difference by acting and speaking out against them in their daily lives.

Femme Allies also take care of themselves to avoid burnout.

Femme allies are:

supporters
activists
compassionate
considerate
generous
militant
"got yo back!"
dyke
responsible
mtf
friend
money
straight but not narrow
lover
willing and able
butch
stud
ftm
masculine
feminine
androgynous
genderqueer
transgendered
lesbian
feminist
womynist
humanist